(Source: shrekyourself)

dutchster:

dutchster:

so a dyslexic man walks into a bra

his wife has just hung some of her bras out to dry and the man couldn’t see where he was going. his dyslexia is irrelevant.

cuntherine:

i am genuinely paranoid that everyone secretly hates me and thinks i am really annoying and ugly and is pretending to be my friend and it’s all part of some big joke

(Source: illuminators)

trillow:

is that a knife in your pocket or are you just happy to yeah fuck he’s got a knife everyone run

  • Teacher: "Can you please tell the class why you're so late?"
  • Me: Someone told me to go to hell
  • Me: Couldn't find it at first
  • Me: But now I'm here

daydreams-at-midnight:

The thrilling sequel to my mom’s Smash Bros. antics has arrived! This time around my 81 year old grandma takes a shot at trying to name the entire Super Smash Bros. 4 roster, and unfortunately she also mistakes Wii Fit Trainer for Elvis. For all the references she makes more relevant to her generation I also added a side image for reference. I hope everyone enjoys this just as much (if not more) than my mom’s.

fadewithfury:

Nine gazing at Rose in #59 for the-untempered-prism

fadewithfury:

Nine gazing at Rose in #59 for the-untempered-prism

Reblog - Posted 1 day ago - via / Source with 226 notes